Random blotting of thoughts

So after 4 nights in a row of hectic nightmares I am simply too scared to go to sleep tonight. I've been running incredibly high anxiety all day and I had forgotten my anti-anxiety pills at home so I had to deal with that all day. Last night I dreamed that I was pinned down on the ground and poked repetitively with needles (I'm a huge needle phobic). It's 22:30 now and I really should get to bed so I can work a productive day tomorrow but I just cannot face what i know is coming. It's not even a maybe anymore, it's for sure now that I will have at least 2 nightmares....well 2 is a good night. This blog might not make much sense but it's just me blotting down my random thoughts because I feel like I need to get them out. I really wish that sleep wasn't something I needed every night. I wish that I could just decide for one day, okay, I've had a few bad nights so tonight I just won't sleep. But you can't go an entire night without sleeping. And then function a whole day. Man, I just don't know what to do. I did some hunting on eBay and Amazon today to see if they had any books on the parasomnias but the books were over R1000 and I don't know if they will even hold any value. I'm so desperate to sleep. Peacefully.  What can I do to make that happen. Just for one night. I just don't know.