Saturday, 5 February 2022

I'm back...still with the same problem...

 Hi there everyone


So I stopped blogging on here for a few years now because it all just became too much for me to keep re-hashing the dreams and what I was going through, with all the doctors and therapists and medications.

It's now 2022, 7 years since I last posted and am sorry to tell you that I am still in exactly the same position as I was before.

I've been diagnosed as Bipolar 2.  That is my mood though, it doesn't affect my dreams.

What has happened in between?  I was admitted to the psychiatric clinic again as I was taking 10 Zolpidems a night to sleep as hard as I could so I didn't remember the dreams.  I knew that couldn't continue so I admitted myself.  I also realised whilst I was there that I had been seeing the same psychiatrist for 7 years and she was at the point of recommending meditation and yoga to me.  I could see she was out of ideas and didn't want to tell me because I was a cash cow to her.

I switched psychiatrists and my new one is amazing.  Whilst he hasn't had any luck with my nightmares, he genuinely cares and sympathises with me.  I have started Ketamine therapy which has been quite helpful and he finally diagnosed me with Bipolar 2, which explains a lot of how I feel during the day.  It may not have helped my nightmares, but I at least take enough medication now to go to sleep without being able to force myself to stay awake.

Soooo that's my 7 year update.  Nothing has changed.

Oh I did start a nightmare disorder support group on Facebook and its grown to just short of 900 members now.  Not one has a cure.  Not one.  But the support is great.  We also have a WhatsApp group where you can sound off right away if you wake up really upset.  So that has helped me feel less alone in this because for a very long time I thought it was just me.  Slowly going crazy.

Cheers for now.

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